Archive for November 29th, 2010

29 Nov 2010

Dad

16 Comments Personal Crap

I close my eyes

and there you are

asking about my day, my life, your grandson.

Your soothing voice calms my fears,

tells me everything is better than good,

makes me believe in my dreams.

I close my eyes and there we are,

me as a child asleep on your shoulder,

but not really. I’m pretending because I love to be held.

You tuck me in and tickle my back,

mom by your side,

you offer soft words of “goodnight” and “I love you”.

I close my eyes

and there you are

at Thanksgiving, my birthday,

all the things you’ve already missed.

I didn’t even mention you because my heart hurt so badly.

I close my eyes

and there we are

In New York, Massachusetts, Philadelphia.

I’m twelve and I’ll remember it forever.

You know me so well.

I’m Daddy’s girl.

I’m so much like you

in so many ways.

I close my eyes

and there you are.

In the army, at your wedding

pictures from before me.

Then I see you holding Garrett

tighter than you ever could.

I see you in him.

I see you.

And then I open my eyes

and you’re still gone.

I still can’t believe it.

I close my eyes again.

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