Archive for July 22nd, 2011

22 Jul 2011

Revelation and Bathing Suits

14 Comments Personal Crap

Didn’t weigh myself again this morning.  Laughing at myself when I look in the mirror because I’m forcing myself to not think bad things.

Listened to the podcast just now, and it re-affirmed everything I’ve been feeling the last few days. I cringed a lot, but less than I thought I would.

Yesterday was G’s last swim class which meant the moms got in the pool. I put on my BIKINI with the skirted bottom. Why do they even make those? The second you get into the pool, the skirt flies up and you’re just wearing a regular bathing suit. Another mom was in a real bikini. She was insanely skinny. I focused on Garrett and what I needed to do to keep him safe and help him to be a good swimmer. I watched in awe as he swam from one end of the pool to the other, and back into my arms. I held him as he caught the “fish” at the bottom of the shallow end, over and over. I felt proud of my son, and the one or two negative thoughts about my stark white love handles… Vanished into the water.

When it was time to dry off, I didn’t run for my towel to cover myself up. I ran to Garrett’s towel to dry him off. THEN I got my own.

There are changes happening, people.